Switch Flip.

Baby, it'll be okay I promise. I'll take care of you and love you and it will all be okay. Right now, that's all I want you to say. I want your arms to hold me and for you to just...be with me. Can't we just be for a while? I need to be still for a bit. Everything just started spinning so out of control and now I'm holding on to threads that are breaking one by one. If I keep moving I might fall apart. I just need you so I can be still for a bit. I always feel so still around you. The world stops, you make it easier when you're around. You help me when I'm weak, you fight for me when I cant, and you love me when I cant love myself. I feel like I imagine this sometimes. Like I'm going crazy and there's no way you could have possibly made me feel like this. You can be so mean, so controlling, so cold, so unaware of you're impact on me. You have two sides to you. One that wouldn't think twice about hurting me and the other that seems like you would do anything for me. I don't know which one to take seriously and which one to ignore. I know that it hurts when you flip the switch and I'm left without you. You act as if I'm this bug that wont go away and that I'm a huge inconvenience in your life. Yet sometimes it's as if I'm one of the most important things in your life. Well I have no idea if I'll ever get used to it, but I will continue to care about you and be there for you until you tell me otherwise, because I promised you a long time I would. I told you I would never disappear no matter what you did or said and I will do what I can to keep that promise. It's the least I can do for you. I just wish that for once you would apologize or show that you care and that you don't mean it or something. I've seen you apologize to other people, so why don't I get the same privilege? What am I doing differently?