Frustration.

She sat there with only thoughts and unclear memories. Reviewing the past, from what she remembered, and trying to find the missing pieces. Her breathing slowed and the pain began to build. Finally, after days of avoiding processing, she began to process all that had happened. The idea of this had been intense, but the fact that it had all actually happened was too much. It was never supposed to happen. It was only a thought, maybe a dream, an idea that had left her mind. What was there to do but drink and let the pain fill the void. She could not avoid dealing with this any longer. The pain was clawing to get out the way a lion claws to try and get out of a cage. So she lay there, bottle in hand, and sank into a pit of despair. She let the pain run through her body and with every breath, there was a little more pain.